So I went and visited my man yesterday. He looked soo good, we had a great visit and a hot kiss at the end. I miss him so much. He's my best friend, he completely understands me, loves me and accepts me. He is so easy to be around, never stressed and compliments me perfectly- except the whole jail thing. But I've made it 5 months by myself and there's only a few left to get through until he's home with me.
The drive sux. Four hours there, four hours back. So, I was driving yesterday about three hours in when I notice that a cop driving in the opposite direction turned around and put his lights on. The next thing I knew I was being pulled over. The first thing that crossed my mind was thank god I wasn't drinking. I asked him if I was speeding, cause I didn't think I was. I have my son in the car and hardly ever speed under normal circumstances. He said I was going 82. BULLSHIT!! I don't even go that fast on a 65 mile an hour highway. Plus there were cars in front of me. How did he know he clocked me? Were we all going 82? Is it because I was the only out of state license plate? And New York to boot?
He gave me a ticket for going 26 miles over the speed limit and told me I have to appear it court because of being 26 over. So if I was going 81 I wouldn't have to drive out of state for a bullshit court date? Did he have a quota to reach?- the fat fuck. Well, nonetheless, arguing with cops never gets me anywhere, but I felt that I was being lied to and singled out for a NY plate. And, there is a $350 fine and I don't even know how many points on my already tarnished license. I just wanted to get back on the road because the twenty minute "detour" made me even more late for my visitation. Well, I was pissed and about 10 minutes after I resumed my trip, a 16 wheeler kicked up a rock and cracked my windshield. GREAT. I really wanted to just pound a fucking bottle of wine and smoke a pack of cigs right there.
When I got home last night I was exhausted and furious at the bullshit ticket I received. I went to bed hoping to sleep off the drama but I couldn't sleep. I slept until about midnight and then was up for the rest of the night, I have no idea why. I was hot, tossing and turning and just thinking like crazy. I was still up at 5:30 when my baby needed a bottle. I finally got some shut-eye from 7am-8am and have been up ever since. My back hurts, my house is a mess, I went through some bills and realized some were late, again. Today sucked. I feel nauseous and edgy and annoyed. But I have to be a mom and put a smile on my face for my son. Thank god he's here or I would probably be a depressed, raging, drunk. Wait, aren't I anyway? Well, enough of my ranting, my back hurts too much to type. Sorry I'm being such a bitch. Thanks you all for the really nice and supportive comments on my last blog. It really helps me. Have a nice night ya'll. Hopefully I can sleep tonight!!!
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8 comments:
ahh, the things we do for our kids. We wouldnt be half the women we are if we didnt do things for the sake of our kids though... I know I wouldn't and I remember you saying that you wouldn't be clean if it wasn't for your little guy.
The ticket is monetary and whether the cop was right or not... he is just doing his job. I hate when they are assholes though. I have a few friends who are cops and your right... thank god you weren't drinking... that is god's blessing to you... or a warning. Funny how such good days come with the bad. keep on writing it out girlie - you have all of us listening.
the wheels of the world keep turning. maybe the time that got used up by being pulled over saved you from a different accident. maybe the rock in the windshield would have been something else. you made it home in one piece, and that's all that really matters.
glad the visit was cool...glad you got there and back safely...
glad you are still blogging...
hey! days like that i wish i just never got out of bed. shall we maybe arrange a hit on murphy 'cause i think it's him!!!
hope your day goes better today. i'm sure it will!
http://anon-recovery-archive.blogspot.com/2007/03/insomnia-if-you-cant-sleep-dont-count.html
Insomnia: "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep, talk to The Shepherd!"
Dang! Shame about the ticket! Hang in there Krista and keep coming back.
(from the just for today card)
"Just for today I will try to live through this day only & not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appall me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime."
Ah well--don't let a piece of paper subtract from the visit, eh?
Rest.
Take care of yourself.
The ticket and windshield happened and you didn't drink about it--THAT'S something worth celebrating.
*sending healing thoughts*
What a bummer, but you did have a great visit and made it home safely. Can you imagine if you were drinking? Ouch!!! Sorry you feel like shit and I wish you a better day. I will be thinking of you and that cute monster of yours. Next time trying crying for the cop. It seems to work for me. Enjoy the sunshine!!!
You didn't drink and that's the most important thing.
S**t happens, life can suck, and it's human to be angry. And here you are, still sober.
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